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11/16/2004 Entry: "Whine whine whine..."

My body hurts so bad. At least I got sleep. I was afraid that I'd be up until 3am because I slept due to the migraine. I slept through dinner, and I didn't want to eat because I can't really eat before I go to sleep, but I ate anyway because I found some spare chocolate which cured a lot of the migraine pain pretty quickly. I also had this craving for cheese, which we also had. Luckily, not only did I go to sleep by 11:45, but I didn't wake up until 7am, when I had to go to work. So I got a lot of sleep.

But I slept pretty soundly, and when I completely relax, parts of my body that normally remain tense for support were not, and I slept wrong or something. My back feels like it's made out of a very non-pliable foam; resisting movement and requiring a lot of effort to keep in various positions. It's not just my muscles, but the joints in the bones. My arthritis has been worse this year than any other year in memory. I should start taking those gelatin supplements, but at $30/bottle, that's a pipe dream along with hearing aids, SAD lighting, and LASIK.

I wish I could go home today at 3, but Christine's in Baltimore, and so I'll be here until 8 or something.

Despite how it sounds right now, my depression hasn't been too bad yet. I have had some minor spells, but all within normal range. I can feel it get bad when it hasn't been sunny for a while, but it's been sunny enough. I recall one December a few years ago the sun didn't come out for over 10 days, and each day was like torture. But while I was worried there for a few days, the sun has been pretty steady for the the week, and I am also looking forward to slumming around on vacation, which starts day after tomorrow. It's not that I dislike my work, I just need to relax, catch up on sleep and some housework. Being in a wide-open pod has made relaxing at work pretty impossible because I am always feeling like someone is right behind me, and will scare the bejesus out of me.

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